My God - What Has Happened To Airports?

Let me start this off by saying that I'm NOT a traveller. Nope, I'm a regular old stick in the mud stay at home kinda person. I'm even ashamed to admit that when I DO travel, I'm the kind of person who looks at her watch and calculates how long it is until I get to go back HOME. I know, I know...pathetic, isn't it?

So, it's no wonder I was absoloutely stunned at how much airports have changed since September 11th. Used to be, when you picked someone up at the airport, and you were married to one of those freakish people who HAD to arrive at the airport at LEAST an hour early - no matter if they were actually catching a flight or just WAITING around to pick someone up, you had several entertainment options.

You could sit in the bar and drink (which will cost you a fortune), you could people watch (okay, I've HEARD there are people who actually enjoy this, but, frankly, I've never gotten the hang of it, watching other people usually just creeps me out), or you could browse in the many, many wonderful gift shops.

I don't know why I love gift shops, but I do. I don't like shopping, and I'm not "into" fashion or decorating my house. In fact, I live in fear an unruly gang of well-dressed, well-coiffed, shopping zealots will one day ring my doorbell and demand I hand over my membership card in The Estrogen Club. Don't laugh..it could happen.

But gift shops are another story. I don't actually BUY anything, but I'm drawn to them like a moth to a flame, convinced that I MUST know SOMEONE who'd just LOVE a postcard from Dallas featuring a herd of longhorn cattle wearing Stetson cowboy hats, or maybe a "Don't Mess With Texas" coffee mug. These are TREASURES people!!

Imagine my angst when, upon arriving at DFW Airport recently, I was brought up short by the evidence of what 9/11 has done to airline travel. GONE are the cute little eateries and bars, GONE are the shoe-shine stations and, God Help Us All, GONE are the Gift Shops!! All of that is gone, at least it is for the people who are there to pick up passengers. That Wonderland might still exist beyond the You Must Have A Boarding Pass To Go Beyond Here Gate, which is located approximately 10 feet from the airport entrance, but it is a barren wasteland for those of us who are waiting to collect weary passengers and deliver them back home.

Seriously, I spent time in two separate terminals (WHY I had to be in two separate terminals is another story, but, like I told a friend, it IS possible to make it from Terminal D to Terminal A in less than 10 minutes, if you don't have a problem with breaking a few traffic laws. FYI - those shuttle drivers are very cranky and get downright pissy if you try to back up the entire length of an entrance ramp. Oh, and those buses are equipped with HORNS, too...who knew?)

Anyway, the FIRST terminal we visited wasn't too bad, but it was decidedly barren and without any frills. I mean, there were restrooms and a candy and drink machine, but the seating area was all the way across the terminal from the Arrival Info screen. So, if you were a compulsive person, like me, you had to keep getting up and schlepping all the way across the terminal to see if, by chance, the flight you were waiting for MIGHT just have moved it's arrival time up a minute or two. In my mind it was terrible and I griped about the morons who obviously designed the place - then I got to go to Terminal #2! Did you know you can actually HEAR Karma laugh out loud?

What can I say about Terminal #2, except that it made Terminal #1 look like some kind of Waiting Room Resort. We're talking DESOLATION here people...bare minimum ammenities...maybe ONE drink machine and 6, count 'em 6, chairs.

As Roger and I went SPRINTING by the boarding gate personnel, I got a whif of coffee from SOMEWHERE and did a pretty good imitation of Layla when she smells a tantalizing bit of cat poop - stopping short and whipping my head around to scan the area for the tasty morsel, hoping against hope I'd see a coffee bar or maybe, God help me, a coffee vending machine - but no such luck.

I know since 9/11 airports have had to take drastic measures to try and ensure the safety of their passengers and the general public. I applaud their actions, I truly do, and, I think they're succeeding in their quest to keep us safer...but would it KILL them to have one teeny tiny little cafe? Oh, and don't forget the gift shop!