You Know It Says Something When...

complete strangers come up to you at the grocery store and make comments like "I wish I was going home with YOU!"

Now, some of you (mostly the people who don't KNOW me) will think, "Wow, she must be really HOT!" The rest of you (the ones who DO know me) are thinking "They must be talking about the amount of groceries she has in her cart!" If you're thinking groceries, you're right.

I fix dinner five nights a week, and with a husband and two, COUNT 'EM TWO, teenage boys, it's no surprise my grocery bill ranges between $150.00 and $200.00 a week. Wait a minute, I just experienced a sharp pain in my head...okay, better now.

What gets me is, apparently, I'm in the minority of people who actually PURCHASE and COOK food. I mean, I see people wandering around the store with, like cranberry juice and lunchmeat in their little baskets and I think "That's IT...that's what you're gonna EAT?" Meanwhile, I'm wrestling with the defective cart from Hell, you know, the one that has the backwheels locked in place so in order to turn into the next aisle you have to DRAG the entire back end around? Uh huh, try THAT with a cart-load and see if you don't get a workout..."Curves" can kiss my ass!

And what about the women who have those mammoth coupon organizers in the baby-seat part of the basket. Now look, y'all, not too many people are more organized than I am, but PLEASE, how in the world does somebody utilize one of those monsters? I don't really think they do, if you'll notice, they RARELY have any actual FOOD in their carts. Nope, I think they just slap that coupon behemoth thing in the seat and then proceed to wander around the store, trying to look oh-so-efficient and thrifty.

Meanwhile, their husbands are trying to come home with ME!